Here at Global Elite Planning, LLC, we strive to create unforgettable, worst-in-class experiences for billions of ordinary humans. That’s why your feedback is important to us. Please take a moment out of your otherwise useless existence to complete this brief one minute survey.
How dissatisfied are you with your experience on Earth?
1 – Slightly Dissatisfied 2 – Somewhat Dissatisfied 3 – Dissatisfied 4 – Very Dissatisfied 5 – Horrified
Have the following issues been successfully unresolved to your dissatisfaction?
WAR ○ Yes ○ No DISEASE ○ Yes ○ No POVERTY ○ Yes ○ No ADDICTION ○ Yes ○ No CORRUPTION ○ Yes ○ No INEQUALITY ○ Yes ○ No CIVIL UNREST ○ Yes ○ No HUMAN TRAFFICKING ○ Yes ○ No AUTHORITARIANISM ○ Yes ○ No EXISTENTIAL DREAD ○ Yes ○ No YOUR CABLE BILL ○ Yes ○ No
How would you rate our lack of responsiveness to humanitarian crises?
1 – Slightly Unresponsive 2 – Somewhat Unresponsive 3 – Unresponsive 4 – Very Unresponsive 5 – Exceptionally Careless
Is our control over all aspects of your life handled professionally?
○ Yes ○ No ○ Not sure
Would you recommend us to a race of slaves on another planet?
○ Yes ○ No ○ Already did
Would you like to upgrade to our Premium Suffering Plan?
○ Yes ○ No ○ Already subscribed
What, if anything, could be worse?
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I am dissatisfied that the radio buttons cannot be pressed. I cannot fill out the survey. Oh the horror!
We have to laugh at this trash fire. Thank you for poking fun at it