Take A Moment To Complete Our Customer Dissatisfaction Survey

Here at Global Elite Planning, LLC, we strive to create unforgettable, worst-in-class experiences for billions of ordinary humans. That’s why your feedback is important to us. Please take a moment out of your otherwise useless existence to complete this brief one minute survey.

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How dissatisfied are you with your experience on Earth?

1 – Slightly Dissatisfied

2 – Somewhat Dissatisfied

3 – Dissatisfied

4 – Very Dissatisfied

5 – Horrified

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Have the following issues been successfully unresolved to your dissatisfaction?

WAR                                          ○ Yes       ○ No

DISEASE                                   ○ Yes       ○ No

POVERTY                                 ○ Yes       ○ No

ADDICTION                              ○ Yes       ○ No

CORRUPTION                          ○ Yes       ○ No

INEQUALITY                             ○ Yes       ○ No

CIVIL UNREST                          ○ Yes       ○ No

HUMAN TRAFFICKING           ○ Yes       ○ No

AUTHORITARIANISM              ○ Yes       ○ No

EXISTENTIAL DREAD              ○ Yes       ○ No

YOUR CABLE BILL                   ○ Yes       ○ No

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How would you rate our lack of responsiveness to humanitarian crises?

1 – Slightly Unresponsive

2 – Somewhat Unresponsive

3 – Unresponsive

4 – Very Unresponsive

5 – Exceptionally Careless

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Is our control over all aspects of your life handled professionally?

○ Yes       ○ No       ○ Not sure

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Would you recommend us to a race of slaves on another planet?

○ Yes       ○ No       ○ Already did

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Would you like to upgrade to our Premium Suffering Plan?

○ Yes       ○ No       ○ Already subscribed

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What, if anything, could be worse?

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Global elites hate when you share New World Humor. Let's keep doing it!